Pages

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

going postal

The cliffhanger is still hanging off the side of the cliff as I share some random musings; in fact the cliffhanger author is still trying to figure out the next chapter …

... a chapter that definitely and absolutely includes the continuation of this blog ...

... because this cliffhanger author just purchased her tickets to Bloggy Boot Camp in Chicago
 
**************************************************************************************************

The plus side of opening my Etsy shop is that I’m actually selling pillows …


… and selling pillows equals some cash in my pocket.  “Hey kids, looks like you won’t have to go to community college after all …”

drop_cloth_pillow_monogram_g

The negative side of the Etsy shop?

The post office.



You see, the pillows I’m selling need to be shipped.  And to ship them I need to go to the post office.  And I can’t take care of this particular transaction from the self-serve area.


union_jack_pillow_final 2

I need to stand in line.


And it’s typically a long line.  A slow moving line.  A line filled with crazy. 


And I bide my time looking around at “the masses” in line …

… and the masses of items they’re shipping.


… and often times texting my husband and sister about the crazy …



Like the person with a box  held together with a full roll of scotch tape that looks as if it’s seen the inside of the post office one two many times …



And then there are the people who, while standing in line, unpack and repack their packages …


… like the woman with a box stuffed with old clothes. Really old clothes. Really old and smelly clothes.  And she proceeded to unpack her already taped up box and start sorting the clothes.  Some were stuffed into a plastic bag she was carrying.  The others stuffed back into the box …


Or those in line who don’t even have their stuff boxed up.  They’re just standing there holding it in their hands.  These standing-in-line-holding-their-item-to-be-shipped-in-their-hands customers are mostly male.  And they typically have the executive-running-errands-on-the-weekend look.  So naturally they think the post office employees will pack it for them …


… like it’s a mailroom or something …


But the one that takes the cake … well, maybe more like the dressing … was the woman I encountered this past Saturday.


I arrived at the post office and was greeted by a moan-inducing long line.  I had no choice but to stay.  Delivery promises were made.


DSCN6670 (550x413)


And that’s when I spotted the problem.



A woman with a box labeled “perishable” was commanding the attention of not one, but two postal employees.  And, from time-to-time, a consult from a third.


Now it was a Saturday.  And the post office doesn’t deliver on a Sunday.  Hence, the perishable delivery time issue.


I didn’t think much about it until she opened the box marked “perishable” and proceeded to pull out one of those disposable Ziploc containers.  And through the see-through plastic I spied a salad.


?


A salad?


And not some fancy schmancy salad.  Just some greens and some dressing.  Maybe a radish or two … and a couple of carrot slices?


Who so desperately needs to ship a plain old salad in a disposable Ziploc container with such urgency that she commands the attention of two post office employees?



Who so desperately needs to ship a plain old salad in a disposable Ziploc container with such urgency at all?


… and at what price?  My sister affectionately called it the “LMAO crazy 50 $ salad”
The questions swirled in my head …


Is it going to some third world salad-deprived country?


Is it some magical salad with amazing healing properties that will save someone from a sure and painful death only – and only if – it can be delivered the next day?


Is it a salad that will cement her spot as the the next Food Network star?  The next contestant on Top Chef? Or Hell’s Kitchen …


And her salad dilemma took more than just a half-hour to be resolved.  Because half-an-hour later my pillow was shipped and I was freed from the crazy …


But that $50-to-ship-a-salad-overnight-to-be-delivered-on-a-Sunday-when-the-post-office-doesn’t-deliver-on-Sundays-crazy was still there …


She gives new meaning to going postal …

Let’s keep in touch … 




facebooktwittercontact


P.S. If you’re new here and are scratching your head saying “what Etsy shop?”  just click on the button below to get in on the loop …


drop cloth design button 250 x 250

get the InLinkz code

33 comments:

  1. Oh- Yeah- Ya gotta love a crazy like that last one! Maybe the dressing was "suspect"...did they bring out the drug sniffing dogs? lol Lots of crazies in this world- xo Diana

    ReplyDelete
  2. UHHHH....UH.....uh......u.....h.....i am very rarely speechless, and this seems to be that rare occasion...truly i am perplexed .......a salad?!?!?! really?!?! I would have had to have asked why, i wouldn't have been able to resist!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. no no, you really don't. You have two options. Figure out if the pillows can be shipped flat rate. You can print that postage online AND schedule a delivery. If that's not affordable to your customers, buy a postal scale and you can weigh them at home, still purchase your postage online, and STILL schedule a pick up!! There are ways around those postal lines!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. That was one crazy funny story! Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  5. You need to order poly bags or boxes in the right size from uline.com or somewhere and buy a postal scale (20 bucks on ebay)and print your postage from home. They will pick up your packages from the house! You need never set foot in the post office again!

    ReplyDelete
  6. It finally makes sense why postal workers have gone mad. Please for your sanity, and so I don't have to ever wonder again why someone would try to ship a salad, try the suggestions everyone left you above and stay out of the crazy.

    ~Bliss~

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMG -- you have the patience of Job!! I have a FedEx account for my Willow House business and I find them to be pretty competitive with USPS prices. Plus they'd pick up. :-) Just a thought! No pillow-masterpiece maker should have to deal with nutty salad-senders!
    xo Heidi

    ReplyDelete
  8. bahahah I'm dying over here! That blows me away with the salad. You can set up a USPS account online and pay for your postage through your account and set the package outside...the mailman will take it for you and you can avoid those crazy shenanigans!

    ReplyDelete
  9. When I was young, I used to read novels by Anne Tyler and I wondered why her fictional worlds were always filled with such odd characters. As I've gotten older and have come to know many many more people (often through my work as a teacher) I realized that most of us are odd--just in different ways. I'm sure the salad mailer would fit right into one of her stories! The Accidental Vegetarian, maybe?

    ReplyDelete
  10. First, so relieved to know you're not completely quitting the Blogging circuit! Second, this is one of the most hilarious posts I've read :)
    Third, congrats on your nomination of the VBA!
    JoAnn

    ReplyDelete
  11. So happy your pillows are selling!

    Post offices are awful, like the devil's waiting room. Thankfully I usually go to one a town over, where the employees are nice and the people are laid back and I try to go at say 9:15am on a Tuesday, so I miss the weekend craziness.

    Or better yet, I just send my husband instead:)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh my gosh, poor you! Post office lines are the worst - they move s-o-o-o s-l-o-o-o-w. And people always have complicated & confusing things that they want to do - can't they just buy a stamp and move on?! Or ship their salad by UPS? ;-)

    We're lucky here, we have pharmacies here with postal counters, so there are more options than just going to the post office. And most are open till late at night, which is super-convenient.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I know what you mean! You are so thrilled to make a sale and ship promptly, but it's an unavoidable trip to the PO. Fortunately for we, it's a block away. But not opened when I first pass it to go babysit my 2 yr old grandson, so around mid-morning we go back over there and stand in line. Sometimes he holds a small pkg. for me other times I struggle with a large package and the Umbroller. People are usually kind and help with the doors when needed. I use it as an outing and a time to teach my toddler manners and social graces. But there is a scale you can purchase and set-up on-line postage rates and an account, then print out stickers and let your postal carrier pick-up your prepaid package. Sounds great! Check it out, it's something I will consider as my Etsy grows. Have a sweet summer! Your newest follower, Linda

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh wow. I thought I had the market cornered on post office crazies, but you win!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Have you tried stamps dot com? I am thinking of opening my etsy shop again, but the whole post office thing...it just kills me. I am thinking about using them and buying myself a scale so I can calculate the shipping myself.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh oh. I thought part II to your last cliffhanger post might be you sipping on a tall wet rum drink while soaking up the sun on a tropical island with no Blogger in sight for a thousand miles in any direction as you got your mojo back. Instead, I find you standing holding pillows in a line at the post office with a crazed lettuce lady. What are we gonna do with you?

    ReplyDelete
  17. There are so many levels to this post.

    ....why is anyone shipping a salad?
    ....how many postal workers does it take to ship a salad?
    ....what is going to happen to all the weekend salad eaters when the post office goes M-F?

    :) me

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh praise the GOOD LORD with your definitely and absolutely statement. Gwyneth and I can put the paper bags we've been breathing into down now :)

    xoxo,
    mk & Gwynnie

    ReplyDelete
  19. Whoever heard of such a thing! Goodness. I love your pillows, btw. You should venture down the road to our little country post office. You can have a nice visit with the post mistress, send your packages, and NEVER stand in line. Then you can go to the old hardware store next door, have a can of pop, and visit with the "loafers"! I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Bloggy Boot Camp?....That sounds intense...so there you go...you can camo pillows to sell at "boot camp'....

    I hate to say this...but I have wonderful post office...Never really more than 2 people in line...all postal workers with a smile...saying..."How Nice" and "Bless your heart"...but then again, I found out quickly that those statements have a double meaning!...Only in the South....

    ReplyDelete
  21. Oh how I WISH you'd just asked her. What's up with the salad? Where's it headed?

    --So we could all have the mystery solved. Because now I'm DYING to know.

    By the way, are you SURE you have to go to the post office?! I ship packages all the time and no longer ever need to go. You can calculate postage online, print shipping labels, etc. They'll even ship priority mail boxes and supplies free, to your door, and pick them up for you.

    ReplyDelete
  22. The salad mailing made me snort my coffee... :D BTW - gorgeous pillows! I especially love the union jack. Do you do custom work?

    ReplyDelete
  23. Get a scale, print your own labels and stop the post office madness!

    Unless you're in the mood for a light lunch - then by all means, get yourself to the post office since you never know what the next strange lady will be mailing!

    Have fun at bloggy boot camp - not that you need it - you're a blogging wiz!
    Kelly

    ReplyDelete
  24. :Hi Linda:
    Thanks so much for stopping by my blog! and following me. I came here and was reading your blog... You're a funny gal! I loved this post. I can so appreciate your 'going postal' story.
    I went over to have a 'look see' at your etsy store. You make some pretty pillows! Never too many pillows in my book.
    You haven't had your shop open very long but you are doing quite well for yourself! I'm interested in starting a store...but I'm afraid to get my feet wet. So many questions. I like to watch and see how everyone else is doing.

    Thanks for following me at Corn!
    Pat

    ReplyDelete
  25. Thank you for your lovely comment!;)
    Your blog is amazing! Your etsy store too.
    These pillows are pretty amazing;)
    I am your new follower!

    Lovely greetings...

    http://pudel-design.blogspot.de/

    ReplyDelete
  26. You totally crack me up. Chicago huh? My son lives there. Will definitely have to check it out. As for the P.O. why don't you ship through Paypal? I invested in an official USPS scale. I know the exact weight of every package. I can print a mailing label in under a minute. I put the packages on my front porch in the morning and magically in a few hours they have disappeared. Actually more like a miracle than magic. The only time I go to the dreaded P.O. is to mail international which I avoid like the plague. I only do it if someone begs me or bribes me. (The bribing has never happened but a girl can dream.) Anyway, I feel your pain. Try to enjoy the rest of the weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  27. I think that lady was smuggling something inside that salad....I agree that you should look into the post office from home thing.

    ReplyDelete
  28. hilarious! i can so relate, living in chicago for so long and doing Etsy as well. i was a major frequenter of the post office near Lawrence and Western and saw TONS of craaaaaaazy!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Okay... I think I'll skip the salad and go straight to dessert :)

    All kidding aside. You don't even have to wait in line with the crazy A$$ unprepared people.

    Message me!!
    Shannon

    ReplyDelete
  30. You're so funny!!!!!!
    As an etsy, eBay,and Amazon seller myself, I have some stories, too. But the salad takes the cake.
    Whew. People are nuts!
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  31. Ugh, I think I just threw up in my mouth! A salad shipped anywhere does NOT sound like a salad that someone should eat!!!
    Hugs,
    Bj

    ReplyDelete